I died

I died to myself. It was my birthday May 7th. The day after I started fasting. I wanted to seek God's face and turn from wicked ways. I wanted to be completely humbled before God. I needed to lose weight. Exercising and cutting calories wasn't working. I knew my body and mind were filled with toxins. I was sick of my stinkin' thinkin'. I was sick of feeling bad. I was sick of the doctor not helping me. I was sick of going 'round and' round and 'round.

So I fasted. For a long time. It started out as a water fast. Then it turned into a raw juice fast. Then it turned into another water fast. What God did and is still doing is amazing. I will NEVER go back to that stupid girl ever again. I can not walk there any more. It was a life of death. I am alive in Christ. I eat differently. I speak differently. I think differently. I have been told by GOD to be quiet.

QUIET!!
Like one of my sons (I have 3), I am a very noisy person - like most Americans. I am loud going 'round and 'round and 'round. All for nothing. The LORD has said, "Be quiet" So I am. It's nice.
Ecc. 4:4-6 says, "again, I saw that for all the toil and every skillful work a man is envied by his neighbor. This also is vanity and grasping for the wind.
The fool folds his hands
And consumes his own flesh
Better a handful with quietness
Than both hands full, together with toil and grasping for the wind."

Christian Americans grasp the wind going 'round and 'round and 'round. Hungry, but not filled. Thirsty but not quenched.

Be still and know who God is.
Shush!!
Be quiet
Moms!! Be quiet.
Dads!! Be quiet.
Quiet down.

If you fast and pray and seek His face and turn from wicked ways as I have.... If you humble yourself before God......If you deny the flesh, walk in the spirit.....If you seek the unseen..........If you die to yourself and live for Jesus Christ...... maybe, just maybe you will be healed, too.

Maybe I will be given grace to tell you of the power of God. But, I'd rather become nothing so that Christ my become everything to you. People, including Christians, would rather follow anyone but Christ. Sad. I will not be anything any more. I will not seek great things for myself. My life is prey. I must decrease. Christ must become everything. So chop off my head, too. Go ahead. I'm only a vessel for God's good use.